Monday December 11
I won't write all my cool Christmas ideas for my family down because half the fun is the surprise and although I am nearly 100% sure it makes me a dork to have blog, I am not sure if it makes you readers one by association. So I am sure even if someone reads this they won't admit it. I am erring on the the side of caution.
Ellen Rose took her first big 5 steps last week. The shirt says it all:
holding on...
letting go...
FREE!
Christmas shopping has been non-existant so far, but alot of it is homemade so I've started that process. It is only slightly overwhelming. In a good way. Instead of going at it with a "get it done" attitude, I look at it like a kid would. If you asked a 4 year old to help you make a certain thing in the kitchen or on the computer-how FUN! And it is. I remind myself of that, and all the sudden, I am less whelmed.
Not sure what I sat down to write about. I find myself just sitting around thinking cheesy thoughts that would annoy me on bad day or a cynic on a good one. BUt it just amazes me how I have so much, more than enough. And the more I realize this, the more we seem to get. Not money, but time, fullfillment, just the things you wish you had when you do not have them.
We watched Cinderella Man this weekend and looking at how that family lived with their kids, and then walking in my kitchen where the food is overflowing out of the pantry. How can I be in a bad mood. How can I hve once OUNCE of self pity??? I think all the time how I am so blessed and I almost wonder if there is something I should be doing with all these blessings I am not doing. I find it very peaceful to always be thinking that I am living the life I am supposed to live and now I just hve to sit back and enjoy it...warts and all. It's too easy. Where is all the angst, confusion, worry I used to carry with me constantly? I am figuring it is a lot just that I am growing up. My cousin Ana once told me that your 30's were the bomb because you are getting things figured out, and have enough money and sense to enjoy it. And you don't give a rat's fanny what others think. That and I get to sleep through the night. I'll NEVER take that for granted again.
Ellen Rose took her first big 5 steps last week. The shirt says it all:
holding on...
letting go...
FREE!
Christmas shopping has been non-existant so far, but alot of it is homemade so I've started that process. It is only slightly overwhelming. In a good way. Instead of going at it with a "get it done" attitude, I look at it like a kid would. If you asked a 4 year old to help you make a certain thing in the kitchen or on the computer-how FUN! And it is. I remind myself of that, and all the sudden, I am less whelmed.
Not sure what I sat down to write about. I find myself just sitting around thinking cheesy thoughts that would annoy me on bad day or a cynic on a good one. BUt it just amazes me how I have so much, more than enough. And the more I realize this, the more we seem to get. Not money, but time, fullfillment, just the things you wish you had when you do not have them.
We watched Cinderella Man this weekend and looking at how that family lived with their kids, and then walking in my kitchen where the food is overflowing out of the pantry. How can I be in a bad mood. How can I hve once OUNCE of self pity??? I think all the time how I am so blessed and I almost wonder if there is something I should be doing with all these blessings I am not doing. I find it very peaceful to always be thinking that I am living the life I am supposed to live and now I just hve to sit back and enjoy it...warts and all. It's too easy. Where is all the angst, confusion, worry I used to carry with me constantly? I am figuring it is a lot just that I am growing up. My cousin Ana once told me that your 30's were the bomb because you are getting things figured out, and have enough money and sense to enjoy it. And you don't give a rat's fanny what others think. That and I get to sleep through the night. I'll NEVER take that for granted again.
Cinderella Man also spoke to my fitness journey as well. When Braddock made his comeback as an old man, a reporter asked him what had changed, and he said “I know what I am fighting for” , there was pause and the reporter said “What are you fighting for?” and Braddock responded quite simply “Milk”. He needed the prize money because he and his family were about to starve to death. Now THAT is why one person finds their way and another one spins their wheels in frustration. For 6 years I’ve been climbing this hill. And I know I m going to get there this time because a)6 years wins me the right to say I am persistent and b) through being a newlywed, gyms closing, 15 hour work days, traveling, my Mom’s passing, a miscarriage, pregnancy, birth and newborn Motherhood all throwing me on and off track, I actually know why I m fighting now. And it is not why I thought I was fighting for years, and it’s not Ellen. I just figured it in the last 2 months and I was shocked because I thought I was self-aware. I was wrong. But now I am sure I know why and it’s been a whole new ball game.
Pictures are SLEEPY
We made an appt to have Ellen's 1 yr photos made several months back, but when we finally met, we had to do it immediately if we wanted any fall color in the pictures. I was so excited b/c given the time of year and this photog's cool attitude-she suggested an old house in Dacula and wanted to do outside stuff, include the dogs and everything so I was excited to get a family portrait as well. We were all concerned about the cold and Allison even called to see if we wanted to move things up a bit so it would warm up a little. In addition, we've spent 2 days power-shopping (I HATE POWER SHOPPING) getting everyone outfitted in a time cold meds for her cold and some cough syrup, Ellen has not napped and I have a HUGE case of guilt for A) gving her meds-it bothers me and B) letting her fight her nap for a whole hour. So I am fit to be tied now that she has sleepy medicine in her AND has missed a nap. We get to the pictures, and she is all the sudden instantly sticking her tounge out. Constantly. We can grab it, and she barely acknowledges it. So all that and every picture (maybe with the exception of a few) is of us, dogs, everyone decked out and Ellen's tounge stuck out like she just burned it on a cup of hot java. So of course we are barely out of the driveway to go home and this is what I see in the backseat. She had a handful of goldfish and just could not quite get them to thier destination before she fell asleep. I was instantly alot less irritated. :)
First Merry GO Round RIDE!!!
"Hey...."
"MOM! Can I go??!!"
"OK, Dad, maybe I dont WANNA get on the horse. here I'll hold you and you hold me."
She never let go of his shirt.
"MOM! Can I go??!!"
"OK, Dad, maybe I dont WANNA get on the horse. here I'll hold you and you hold me."
She never let go of his shirt.
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2006
My Very First Homework Assignment
For PMO, Ellen was given this turkey feather and we had a few weeks to decorate it so it could be added to teh turkey in her hallway at school. So of course, the morning of the due date, I finally got around to it and she was game for about 3.5 minutes then it was over. But we got it done and it was her very first homework assignment!
We finally got Ellen out to the park and went a few laps with her in her new trailer. Since she kind of flops around, I stuffed Pooh on one side and I stuffed a big blanket on the other. She fell asleep but she wole up when we stopped and I snapped this with my phone.
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 09, 2006
The punkin in the patch
I did not realize these had not been downloaded yet! What a fun day! We took her to
the pumpkin patch right around Halloween and it was super cold that day but it was so beautiful and she loved it.
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 08, 2006
New stuff
She is changing so fast I have stopped writing it all down in favor of just keeping up with her! She is waving bye-by and Hello and HI at everything. Her friend Emma gave her one of those little baby blanket with the stuffed animal at the top yesterday and we have not taken it out of the car, she is totally occupied with it. She holds it up with one hand and waves "Hey" at it constantly. And chews on its ears. :)Which brings me to the next milestone.
Her first word(s) is "Hey!!!" or "Hi!" She grabbed my cell and put it up to her ear and started babling away last week. Then she did it with the remote control. Imitation! How fun!! She waves and says this to everything and she tries to add Bella's name when she is waving at her. She now points at pictures and trees b/c we are always pointing at these things. And I was so excited this morning b/c she pointed at Mike in a picture and said "DADA" and I was about to call him and she pointed the bird on a bird watching book on the same shelf and said "DADA." She is also walking with assistance and just starting to decide that maybe going from one thing to the next without assistance would be fun. We do drills where we pass her back and forth at night. She thinks it is hilarious.She is also expanding her diet. Broccoli, homemade peanut butter, basmati rice, eggs, cottage cheese, baked potatoes, yogurt, and cheez-its are the current leaders. She ate half my salmon at Long Horn the other night and we gave her out leftover grouper from last night for lunch today. She mowed through it. I'm trying to get her to eat cooked apples but she wants to hold the whole raw one and gnaw on it. She also likes pears and bananas. We tried some ravioli last night but it was not a hit. In other news I am finding my feet as a trainer. It is getting easier but no less overwhelming. Keeping up with many different aspects of many different people’s lives in disjointed 10-12 hours a week is hectic. I need to establish a system so I don’t feel so all over the place. But I am trying to be patient about that. I have to just grown and learn as things come. And it’s coming.
We are all geared up thinking about the holidays around here. Ellen got an early Christmas present so we could enjoy it before it gets too cold. She seemed to think it was worth her time for sure...
And last but not least I am feeling thoughtful. I listen to his guy Ed Young on the elliptical sometimes and today in one of his talks he said we are born asking a 3 word question…3 words resonate over and over in a child’s mind. We are born asking “Do I MATTER? Do I Matter? Do I matter?” He said that the first mirrors that we look into are the mirrors of our parent’s eyes. If reflected back are words of affirmation, dignity, value…then chances are we have a healthy mental state. If reflected back is that you are too fat too skinny you can’t make it you aren’t what I wanted you to be, then chances are you believe those things and live them. It dawned on me that my responsibility to Ellen is so much bigger than keeping her clean, dry, fed and rested…although it’s kind of too easy to get caught up in that. I want to think I’d reflect affirmation dignity and value but I guess we all would. But thinking of it in those terms, she is constantly figuring out “do I matter?” I am going to spend a little time letting that knock around my noggin this afternoon.
Her first word(s) is "Hey!!!" or "Hi!" She grabbed my cell and put it up to her ear and started babling away last week. Then she did it with the remote control. Imitation! How fun!! She waves and says this to everything and she tries to add Bella's name when she is waving at her. She now points at pictures and trees b/c we are always pointing at these things. And I was so excited this morning b/c she pointed at Mike in a picture and said "DADA" and I was about to call him and she pointed the bird on a bird watching book on the same shelf and said "DADA." She is also walking with assistance and just starting to decide that maybe going from one thing to the next without assistance would be fun. We do drills where we pass her back and forth at night. She thinks it is hilarious.She is also expanding her diet. Broccoli, homemade peanut butter, basmati rice, eggs, cottage cheese, baked potatoes, yogurt, and cheez-its are the current leaders. She ate half my salmon at Long Horn the other night and we gave her out leftover grouper from last night for lunch today. She mowed through it. I'm trying to get her to eat cooked apples but she wants to hold the whole raw one and gnaw on it. She also likes pears and bananas. We tried some ravioli last night but it was not a hit. In other news I am finding my feet as a trainer. It is getting easier but no less overwhelming. Keeping up with many different aspects of many different people’s lives in disjointed 10-12 hours a week is hectic. I need to establish a system so I don’t feel so all over the place. But I am trying to be patient about that. I have to just grown and learn as things come. And it’s coming.
We are all geared up thinking about the holidays around here. Ellen got an early Christmas present so we could enjoy it before it gets too cold. She seemed to think it was worth her time for sure...
And last but not least I am feeling thoughtful. I listen to his guy Ed Young on the elliptical sometimes and today in one of his talks he said we are born asking a 3 word question…3 words resonate over and over in a child’s mind. We are born asking “Do I MATTER? Do I Matter? Do I matter?” He said that the first mirrors that we look into are the mirrors of our parent’s eyes. If reflected back are words of affirmation, dignity, value…then chances are we have a healthy mental state. If reflected back is that you are too fat too skinny you can’t make it you aren’t what I wanted you to be, then chances are you believe those things and live them. It dawned on me that my responsibility to Ellen is so much bigger than keeping her clean, dry, fed and rested…although it’s kind of too easy to get caught up in that. I want to think I’d reflect affirmation dignity and value but I guess we all would. But thinking of it in those terms, she is constantly figuring out “do I matter?” I am going to spend a little time letting that knock around my noggin this afternoon.
