Business owndership should not be a self-created hamster wheel!

Take it from this pro: LEARN TO REST, NOT QUIT. Winners don’t take Fridays off until the key activities are checked off! It’s ok to rest but champions create distance on Fridays! I hope you completed the high return, leveraged actions for your business and then clocked OUT. Your purpose is freedom, not a self-created hamster wheel.

Products and Practices that worked for relieving chronic severe pain and depression/anxiety

Someone needs to hear this.  I see people daily and I recognize my old existence and if one of them reads this and gets 1 piece of their puzzle solved, it will be WORTH IT 100%, no question.

I have been more vocal than most about the flurry of circumstances and the resulting struggles of the last few years.  Details on that in the last few blog entries.  It was not one but several unrelated circumstances leading to a perfect storm that lead to words we see and hear daily (depression, chronic pain, anxiety) that in reality look like this -

I share this so the person who it resonates with can benefit!

What I felt like daily:

1. Pure exhaustion most days - this is as much physical as it is mental and I see people everyday now and I know this is how they feel and are accepting it as normal.
2. Lack of stamina to do daily activities - even with the mental desire, I had lost the physical stamina to conduct a regular day.  It was like dragging a 50 pound pack with you everywhere. 
3. Fear of things with a big energy outlay (traveling, shopping, multiple appointment days)
4. Woke to pain in my back, feet and neck (usually a sleeping arm as well) all night long and woke in massive pain in the morning.  
5. Desperate to sleep to just rest and feel lack of pain, but generally unable.
6. Lack of motivation
7. Lack of enjoyment in normal things 
8. A realization that things that should be uplifting, or joyful, were not.
9. An ability to be around others and genuinely enjoy them and seem (99.9%) of the time as if nothing was wrong if it was a short visit.  Short visits are great distractions and opportunities to feel like onesself so they were nice but betrayed what it was like most of the time.
10. Knowing I was off but unable to know how to fight what I couldn't see and what was unknown. 
11. Loss of hope.
12. COMPLETE LACK OF CLARITY OR PASSION OR ANYTHING.  Even things I wanted to be passionate about.
13. A huge void not only for the things I had lost in life, but also for the me I used to be. I had no idea to approach a day not knowing who this "new" person was...!  I think I mourned that loss as well!  No, I know I did.

All the practices I had used in the past to maintain a healthy body and mind (and spirit!) felt like they were failing me.

They were:

1. Daily reading of positive enrichment, personal development courses
2. Bible study group, personal bible study and prayer
3. Meditation
4. Daily exercise and movement
5. Excellent sleep hygiene
6. Journaling
7. Chiropractic adjustments
8. Massage
9. NSAIDS (daily tylenol, aleve, etc)
10. Muscle relaxers
11. Caffeine and vitamins
12. Joining a service organization (Rotary Club) and volunteering at church

I followed all the advice I had ever been given or had given others.  It felt like there was some progress and then zero.  The classic, one step forward, 2 steps back.  The reality is I was making minuscule progress and it just didn't feel like it.  It is like climbing a mountain with a blindfold on, and it feels like you might be on a treadmill because you can't see if you are ACTUALLY moving forward, even though you are working hard.   This is why people quit!  How long would you continue to fight that mountain if it never felt like you were moving forward??

The reality I learned is that those things were working very well to keep me from getting worse, getting me closer to feeling better, and finding what can work and what cannot, at least for me.  Looking back, I see that my PERCEPTION was I was so different, not able to fight or be focused, then I realize how much effort I was putting in (see above list) and that in face, I am still the "team no quit" chick I've always been...I just couldn't see or feel the results for quite a while. Plus I had not found the perfect combo of activities.

I share that because if you know logically that something should help, I personally believe you have to trust it is helping and continue to fight rather than quit doing the things that you know help, even if you don't feel better.

Below is a list (and some backstory) of what helped (omitting what has not been helpful), in no particular order.

• The first stage of progress I can identify in retrospect was going to see my doctor and confessing how I felt.  That referral lead to a an appointment with a Dr./Therapist who prescribed me prozac and it was actually quite helpful.  I stayed on that until I unintentionally weaned off while traveling because i left the prescription at home.  The resulting headache during that trip inspired me to try to stay off of it and see how I did.
• Therapy...kind of! I went back to 3 more appointment and my first Dr had retired so I saw a stand in, who contradicted what my GP and firs doc told me, dismissing a problem and saying I was in between seasons basically.  I asked for therapy and I was referred to group therapy.  I arrived with a notebook ready to work and it was not unhelpful except the lady there alluded that I was too "on it" to need to be there so I didn't feel like I fit.  The next time I went I had a 3rd doctor and I just cancelled the appointment.  Had I pushed on, I would have gotten better alot faster so - get your therapy! IMO, everyone needs therapy, including me, including now.  
•  I have had a total commitment to daily exercise/movement.  For about a year that was taking the dogs around the block, a few days a week.  Then I tried a mile.  And it waxed me.  But I added some in home workouts. I signed up for 7 minute workouts and they were FANTASTIC!  I recommend them to anyone, if you need a small start, or if you're just in a hurry.  These were such a great fit for me and I think her training is brilliant.  I was unable to do what is usually considered gentle like plank, and several other things.  But I did what I could and given my stamina issues, I knew I could do 7 minutes.  And I did.   This was a foundation that took around 6 months.  
• A huge key was keeping a calendar in plain view and marking if I went for a walk or did my 7 minutes that day, or the exercise I have since added on.  
• I gave up dreams intensity for consistency.  For over a year... (that is a long time!!!!) My biggest focus was on walking the dogs consistently and daily steps using my fitbit and when it died I bought a 3rd generation apple watch.  Daily activity was my focus over a huge fitness undertaking.  My body just would not allow it.  Over time, I felt stamina return and I began just recently adding in more workouts and now we walk a minimum of 2 miles 3-4 x a week and I train with Mike 2-3 times a week doing 20-30 minute crossfit style metabolic workouts that we steal from 2 instagram accounts (https://www.instagram.com/twlwods/ and https://www.instagram.com/tatted_strength/).  Its begun to snowball because now I have more energy to do more in a day so its just finally building in the right direction.
• The correct kind of yoga. The next piece of the puzzle for me was yoga for restoration.  I did a whole blog on it here called NOT ALL YOGA IS CREATED EQUAL.  Yoga is not EASY, nor is it GENTLE.  I do want to dispell that myth.  I say starting with no more than 10 minutes and 3 times a week was a gracious plenty.  I could not sit indian style when I started but day by day, mobility improved and the body definitely heals when you move.  So does the mind in my opinion.
• Self massage and adjustments. I gave up massage and chiropractic due to lack of results in this season.  In my healthier seasons, they were game changers.  Now I rely on a simple neck massager from amazon and these Chirp wheels.  
• Inversion table.  I probably have not used it in a year and was going to sell it but I am hanging on to it incase I find myself in need.  For the really rough times, it was super helpful. 
• THC-free CBD - I have tried 4 brands.  This has been the one thing that when I added it, everything else slowly began to change and then kept improving month after month.  Each thing I have listed actually worked BETTER.  IT was like an amplifier for all the things I was doing.  And it eliminated the need for NSAIDS, muscle relaxers, copious caffeine (in a desperate attempt to get motivated and focused) It got me over the hump and is the reason that I could do and stick with the yoga, walking, workouts and all of the sudden every single thing I did began to work and I didn't need anything else.  It is the one thing I would not give up.  
• Meditation.  Its a painful thing to learn to do.  yet it is powerful.  The more I study it the more I understand why it helps so much. 
• Sleep hygiene.  I place a high priority on sleep.  That means over TV, social engagements and I track how much I sleep to spot problems.  I set boundaries so that I am well rested on a routine basis. 
• Journalling, bible study, and personal development.  This is something that I have believed in for decades and I have sustained this habit.  After starting CBD and getting some forward momentum with workouts, stamina, and my physical fitness, I found the impetus to write and enjoying that and it was a huge milestone... see "finding joy in things I know I should enjoy/love to do!" that I had lost.
• I took a DNA test to assess my genetics for fitness markers so I could customize my supplements, learn my diet and workout needs and what I am genetically wired to need for optimum health.   I learned my fatigue was from b6 deficiency and that I was not sensitive to caffeine so I backed off of that and found the high b6 supplements and foods.  I learned several other things that took the guesswork about what is BEST for me.  I began to focus on nootropics rather than caffeine for energy with fabulous results. 
• Andy Frisella and 75HARD - Of the many personal development things I consume, must highlight this one.  I found something struck me with Andy Frisella.  He struggles with depression, built a billion + company on the same beliefs I hold regarding business and he firmly believes investing in being his best mentally and physically is the foundation for his best life, personally and professionally.  I 100% believe this, as its been 100% true for me.  If you are at the beginning of your healing, I want to share that I modified his 75hard parameters and committed to the concept. Today, Im still using the concept and its become the lifestyle that supports me especially since there is a movement, a podcast and since I started he has come out with a book.
• High fiber diet (and water).  Learning that I NEED carbohydrates and seek them because of the fatigue... forced me to shift my thinking.  Partnering wit a nutritionist and using my own decades of studying nutrition, I knew continuing to lower them to try to reduce the weight on my frame was a lost cause. I shifted from focusing on protein (which levels blood sugar and therefore appetite and mood) to focusing on fiber so that I have the carbohydrates for energy and also the same effects of level blood sugar, and therefore appetite and mood that higher fiber diets provide.  Its been a huge reason the weight is melting off - making the movement better, the pain even less, and its a positive spiral up rather than down!
• Volunteering.  I will say that I really had to dig deep to keep up with 2 service commitments each week since I started.  If this resonates with you, I encourage you to do SOMETHING.  It has been hard to be around people and not be myself AT! ALL! But to stay engaged and feel great about helping someone else besides focusing on myself I think is priceless.  Not always fun when you are not at your best, but priceless nonetheless.

This is the entirety of my strategy.  I take ZERO medicine, NSAIDS, muscle relaxers, chiropractic, physical therapy, etc.  And I just had my first massage in a long time.  Always beneficial, but not necessary for my daily functioning!  

In case you are looking for a framework for what the daily habits look like:

1. CBD - first thing every single day
2. Vitamins (b6!) and nootropics
3. Reading/setting/assessing goals, writing, enrichment, sometimes meditate (usually about 30 min - hour)
4. Water - over 1/2 gallon
5. Fiber over 35 grams
6. Daily workout (yoga, metabolic, 2 mile walk or if I dont do something designated 10,000 steps!)
7. Mark my habits on a calendar in plain view so I can see all my momentum and not get caught up in a missed day!

I am so glad to be sharing this and I really hope I hear from others who are struggling, or have struggled and found this helpful and can get back to life.  Email me anytime at annathetrainer@me.com with your story, or questions.

Onward and upward,
Anna

The plight of the small entrepreneur and soloprenuer

Are you a solorpreneur or small entrepreneur trying to to make your way and fulfill a dream?  If so, I say without hesitation...your courage is inspiring and your workload is tiring!

I have a heart for the soloprenuer or a partnership/married team because not only have I been and still AM you... I love the heart behind risking it all to change and better the lives of others through your work.  I also believe our country is built on your back...we are the small businesses that make the economies thrive.  What more motivation could I have to help than that!?

I believe the health and wellness entrepreneur/solopreneur will read this and think I am in their head, but if you own another type of business and this screams at you... this is for you, too!




Some things most people don't realize about what you do are:

1. You do it because your lives have been dramatically changed by health and wellness. What you provide is your passion because it completely changed your life and nothing will stop you from paying that forward to change the lives of others.
2. The burden on your shoulders is hefty. You are the content creator, copywriter, janitor, CEO, accountant, administrative assistant, staff hirer, firer, meeting holder, systems creator, and customer service representative. 
3. You are completely aware of the power of social media and therefore leveraging that to grow your business. You don't want somebody else without your heart and passion running your social media and it does add another thing on your plate.  Possible to pick what is priority and what is not because everything that happens in and around your business reflects on you and therefore it is all priority. That is a heavy burden to bear!

The issue Im seeing is that we are so passionate about the content and the product and service that we often don't separate that from the best message that would most reach the people we want to serve.   With everything else we have, we dont have the time to learn how to choose the best person for the job and we dont have the time to find out how to learn how to best do it for ourselves.

I observe wellness entrepreneurs and sole proprietorships just continuing to do the same thing maybe trying to just do more of the same thing and have a bigger presence but finding it overwhelming to have a better plan.  Often times there just isn't the space.

This is you, let's talk. I really love helping those on a mission to reach more people and simplify their lives by sharing what I have learned in the form of simple conversations in guidance that can help you come up with a plan that increases your impact while reducing your workload.

All the best!
Anna

Clearer than ever

The most important thing is a big thank you.  Big thank you to anyone who has read along as I posted this story in parts (also consolidated in the next post here) on my Facebook entrepreneurial encouragement page @uncommonoptimism, that sometimes doubles as my writing page.

I have received texts, DMs, comments and calls and I have heard a resonating theme.  Their pain was deeper than they shared and so they related.  And did not feel so alone.  Mission Accomplished.

The secondary mission was accomplished as well.  For me, writing this narrative was 100% necessary.  It was my mind's way of making sense of what had happened and giving it a permanent place, so that I could actually leave it behind me, begin writing and processing the new and fresh ideas for life.  

Sometimes I minimize my pain and want to hide it and then I do things like this that hang it out for the world to see.  For some reason the hiding it makes it unbearable, even tho I so desperately want to act as if its not there.  And sometimes I do.  This was my way of owning it.  Of acknowledging it. 

Its been almost 2 years since Dad died.  And I never thought I'd say this but I am experiencing massive excitement for the future. Finding JOY was my focus for 2019 but it was intermittent.  Now the joy is the norm.  And with that joy comes excitement and ideas for me, for our family, for work, for my life and a huge hope for the future.  In many ways I am actually better.  

I have left people pleasing and striving ambition behind. I see now those things are not only unhealthy, but dependent on me being a certain way and I can't control that.  I am human.  I appreciate those who didn't need me to be a certain way (upbeat! motivating! adding value! productive! happy!) in order to see value in me and stay just as connected while I walked the darkest time in my entire life as they were prior to it.  Some people supported me more!  I endeavor to be like those people.  

In addition to rebuilding my physical self and having PRs nearly every week (YAY!!!!), I am reading and soaking up every moment of joy with my family and our future plans.  I have a totally different perspective on the work - life balance.  Im clearer than ever on what I want and what I don't want.  All of it is a gift.  I can't say (and I wont say to sound like it puts a nice bow on the story) that any of it was worth losing Dad.  But I can say there is, after all, some good things that have come to me from it.  

I also have some great content swirling in my head for anyone who finds value as far as sales and entrepreneurship.  I have business improvement systems I want to try for my own business.   All of it exciting and a something I feel lucky to have the chance to do: create and serve and experiment, all a huge challenge, for a living.  

The next chapter will prove to be nothing short of interesting. 

Thanks to all who are here for joining me on this ride!

I expect things to only get better from here. 

oxoxoxo,

Anna

PS:  Along this journey, I tried lots and LOTS of things to get out of pain, lose weight, improve my mental health, regain clarity and more.  Comment on FB or IG (whatever lead you here) if you'd be interested in that summary of products and processes that worked for me.

PPS: 

Here is the last picture I took with dad on our weekly jaunt here and there. This was 2 years ago this month. He was suddenly gone about a month later. I am committed to honoring him (and Mom) in this next chapter!  WATCH OUT!